Neal Larson: Moran

Neal Larson is angry at ‘militant atheists’. Why? It’s not entirely clear, but after carefully reading his ‘Militant Atheism Rears its Ugly Head‘, I conclude it’s because these terrible, ungodly people dare to speak up for themselves.

Since we should never assume malice where simple incompetence suffices, let’s be kind and assume that Neal really lost his marbles writing this.

First, he flat out states that he

would refuse to vote for a proud and vocal atheist for high office, regardless of any offsetting credentials.

But he would vote for proud and vocal theists who flaunt their faith – who make a show of going to church, and make it a point to use phrases like under god during allegiance, …so help me god for their oath, or finish their speeches with God bless America. Because double standards are a sign of healthy morals, right? I guess his regardless of any offsetting credentials is the cherry on top to underscore his open-mindedness.

He then unintentionally proves that he doesn’t know the difference between private and official roles, claiming that a school official who leads everyone into prayer over the intercom is merely someone who privately affirms their faith. A little later he bemoans the fact that many Americans are falling prey to political hyper-correctness, who then outlaw phrases like ‘bless you’. Doing that would indeed be silly – but it is in no way something that Atheists would demand. It’s what religious people do because they erroneously believe that saying ‘bless you’ would offend Atheists. It doesn’t. And here’s a hint: we don’t mind people saying ‘merry Christmas’ either. We know how to interpret kindness, thank you very much.

But those are only small fry. Neal goes full-on Moran with this:

While atheists are certainly capable of doing good works, those good works are not inspired by an absence of belief in God. How could they be? If atheists do good, it is in spite of – not because of – their atheism, so let’s stop acting like not believing is just another super awesome way of believing.

Can you be more condescending while spouting world-class stupidity? His complacent ‘How could they be?’ alone is weapons-grade stupid, merely underscoring the fact that Neal has skipped Ethics 101. So he’s never heard of Euthyphro – his (rather obvious) loss. But to really kick this into a universe of stupidity of it’s own is to accuse Atheists that they believe Atheism to be a religion. Not understanding non-belief is one thing. But confidently stating an idiocy of this magnitude is really asking for it.

He then whips himself into a truly righteous anger, condemning the activities of some atheists:

Particularly insidious are the atheists who get a sense of satisfaction eroding the faith of others and behave as though it is a favor to rattle another’s belief in a higher power.

Although I, too, have qualms about ‘proselytizing’ Atheists, I would like to pose the following two questions to Neal:

  1. Do you think that Christian missionaries are equally reprehensible?
  2. How do you define the word hypocrisy?

At the end of his text, Neal forgoes the classic ‘Hitler’ argument (which I was expecting), likening atheists to jihadists instead:

I think we could all be more tolerant of unintrusive atheism, because who doesn’t have doubts? But let’s separate them from the purveyors and jihadists of Godlessness

It requires an extraordinary level of incompetence – or, ideed, malice – in times of daily beheadings, rape and torture by jihadist ISIS and militant believers who kill for their god, to use either term in conjunction with atheists who until today have never killed, tortured or raped anyone in the name of unbelief.

What a piece of self-important, hypocritical, holier-than-thou drivel. It’s difficult to believe someone can be that incompetent.

Write less, think more, Neal.

Taking sides…

Some people have complained that I’m dishing it out all too one-sided; that all I do is lambasting Christians, Muslims and Hindu, showing how unjust, homophobic and misogynic they are, but not telling the whole story. In short, I’m too one-sided.

My bad. I certainly did not want to make it appear as if I’m taking sides. So, without any further ado, regard this:

Walkthisway

(Image credit: The Independent)

Yes, the Jewish religion is as #%*&! up as the rest.

Glad to have cleared that up.

Stupidity Challenge

Steve Neumann, in a Salon article, challenges all atheists to

refrain from posting disparaging commentary about Christian newsmakers on Facebook and other social media sites — including blogs — for one month.

Why? Because Neuman, himself an atheist, believes that atheists are too negative, and should refrain from ridiculing believers, lest they are offended and cast atheism in a bad light. As bad examples of too-aggressive atheists, Neumann cites Bill Maher, Sam Harris, and Richard Dawkins.

Which makes you wonder what Neumann is smoking. Maher’s one-liner ‘I don’t need a mandate – sounds gay to me’ exposes homophobia and political ignorance with just nine words better than the entirety of Neumann’s article.

The single biggest reason atheism exists is because religious exponents, based on their own misguided morality, try to force their worldview on others. Foremost on the mind of everyone this week are black-hooded religious monsters that kill, torture and mutilate for Allah. This is not the time to dial down the rhetoric.

Belief in false gods has real, tangible result for many. And it is the exponents of religion – those who are targeted by atheists – who contribute most to the problem. It’s called leverage – if you expose the stupidity of one leader, his followers may start to think. When Archbishop John Nienstedt preaches hate, it’s much better to attack and ridicule him than to try to point out his idiocy to each individual member of Nienstedt’s parish.

Plus, Maher is God.

Crosswire logic

Computer science knows a special case called ‘Short-Circuit evaluation’ that – despite its misleading name – allows computers to correctly evaluate an expression more quickly. For example, if you evaluate ‘a AND b’, you can stop evaluating if a is false; the whole expression will be false no matter what b evaluates to.

It seems the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, has demonstrated another kind of logic that – since ‘short circuit’ is already taken – we should call ‘Crosswire Logic’: no matter what either side of the expression evaluates to, the result is always what you want.

In an interview with the BBC Welby admits candidly that he sometimes doubts the existence of God, yet he is certain of the existence of Jesus.

Welby’s comment is strongly reminiscent of what the Swiss believe of their national hero and freedom fighter William (Wilhelm) Tell: They aren’t sure if he ever existed; it is a fact, however, that he killed Imperial Vogt Gessler.

The Gay Choice

Tennessee preacher Robby Gallaty has defended homophobia and discrimination against gays. Closing the gap to the Westboro Baptist Church (you know, the loonies that picket funerals holding up signs that say ‘God Hates Fags’), he also advocates killing homosexuals. His argument: being gay is a choice – perhaps similar to the fact that being a hate preacher is a choice.

But how does he know that? Has he decided to be attracted to women instead of men? Has he tried to be gay? It’s not as if this is difficult to understand. If he tried, he knew.

What is wrong with this guy that he not only worries about what other people do between the sheets, but also preaches against it?

Gallaty takes justification for his hate from the Bible, specifically the Old Testament (which, according to so many Christians isn’t in force anymore, because, you now, Jesus and stuff. Yeah, right), specifically Levicitus (a.k.a. third book of Moses).

Like this moral ass, I read the same book. Levicitus 20 indeed says what Robby Gallaty says it does. Yet, only a few lines further down it also says that people who are tattooed should be put to death. As should be people who wear garments made from two kinds of thread (the shirt he wears in the video looks like a cotton/synthetic mix to me…).

And of course, Levicitus is extremely clear on what to do with people who work on the sunday. Not just one, but three passages in just that section tell you that god wants you to kill them: “Bring them outside the camp, and stone them”. Guess on which day of the week Gallaty does most of his work.

If you wondered, Levicitus is also the part of the Bible that tells you that killing a couple of doves and sprinkling their blood about (plus some other hokus pokus) will cure Lepers. Yeah, that’s Levicitus. A great place to draw your inspiration from.

For the glory of God and the honor of God in your body, you may have to remain single for the rest of your life

Let me quote Proverbs 17:28 for you, son:

Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise: and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.

May I suggest that for the Glory of God and Humanity you STFU?

Duck Brain

On the subject of ISIS’ barbaric murders, the bearded studio guest raises his hand, the index finger extended:

God said: “All who hate me, love death”

and

Either convert them or kill them, one or the other.

When you think that wacko was a fundamental islamist, you wouldn’t be too far off. It was Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson, interviewed by FOX’s Sean Hannity, and he was talking about ISIS. That it’s difficult to discern a lunatic Islamist from a crazy Christian is no surprise; after all, the difference in their beliefs is semantic at best, their god is the same one. And both are blood-soaked, barbaric ideologies.

Ducky Brain then went on to say that he’d much prefer to convert the murderous thugs to christianity than to kill them. Oh, great. Then we’ll have lunatic, wide-eyed, heavily armed murderers for Jesus instead of Allah. What could possibly go wrong?

Now, as I remarked before, from the outside the loony bin is just a big building. I find it remarkable that the inmates are at each other’s throat while reciting exactly the same hate-filled stupidities.

And very, very, frightening.

Evil squared

There is a peculiar attribute of logic that is initially difficult to comprehend, and even more difficult to master: Negation. How is it that negating a statement twice makes it positive? And don’t get me started about negating a phrase with ‘or’. Eventually, though, we figure it out.

Or not. At least not when looking at religion: Evil, theologians say, is the negation of Good. Satan is evil – at least according to scripture. The epitome of evil.

And when evil people die, they’ll go to to hell where he tortures them.

Whoops… You see how difficult negation is? You just screwed up the negation. Satan would not torture evil people. Why would he? If he was truly evil, he’d torture good people.

Well, I guess there’s a reason why most holy scripture was written before people learned basic logic.

Dr. Dumb

In Liberia, an outbreak of deadly Ebola has already killed more than 1’300 people. Missionary Dr. Kent Brantly contracted the disease himself. Unlike most of the Ebola patients, he survived. Also, unlike most of the Ebola patients, he received an experimental drug designed to cure Ebola. Now, it is too soon to conclude that the serum cured the doctor; ten percent of those who fall ill to Ebola recover by themselves. But it’s enough to be optimistic that the serum helped.

Dr. Brantly, after his recovery, and in full knowledge of the fact that he received experimental treatment, and, despicably, in full knowledge that one of the greatest contributors to the spreading of Ebola in Liberia is rampant superstition, took every opportunity to spread more superstition:

I am more grateful every day to the Lord for sparing my life and continuing to heal my body.

and

Above all, I am forever thankful to God for sparing my life

Well, you ungrateful idiot, the nurses and doctors who risked their life while treating you are who healed you. Or are you so deluded that you think your god loves you more than those thousands who died? The experimental serum that very likely saved your life was designed by scientists to fight a disease – a disease that has been created by your god. Your god then gave this disease to thousands of people – including you. By surviving, I would argue, you are going against His plan, so don’t thank him too quickly. Next time, don’t take experimental drugs against god-given diseases – just pray and see what happens.

During a press conference, Dr. Dumb then went on to sermonize thusly:

Please continue to pray for the people in Liberia.

No! If you want to help, do something. Send money, food, or organize awareness drives. Praying only helps yourself feeling better, while those in Liberia keep dying. Liberia desperately needs your help – in more than one way: they need better medical infrastructure to fight the outbreak. They need better education to rid the country of dangerous superstitions. Mostly, though, they need greater help in overcoming poverty.

Also, Liberia apparently needs better medical experts to replace those who attribute healing powers to ghosts or gods.

A Diabolic God

There is a conundrum that many believers wrestle with: the existence of evil in the face of a benevolent god. When looked at from a different perspective findphonebase.ca , though, it’s not a conundrum at all.

Let us for a moment assume that believers have it right – a god exists. How then can we reconcile the evil that we see in the world with the assertion that god is benevolent?

We can’t. Does that mean that God doesn’t exist? Almost – but not necessarily. Another possibility remains, one that makes a whole lot more sense than what is commonly believed. Again, we are working under the assumption that God does exist. Now let us extend this assumption to Satan. Called the ‘Prince of Lies’, his character is described as evil, craving worship, and eternally envious of God’s glory.

Behold: Al-Shabaab, Boko Haram, IS(IS), Taliban and all the other barbaric murderers in the name of god, including the christian murderous savages called Lord’s Resistance Army. It is inconceivable that they are fighting for a benevolent supreme being. Yet they would have you believe that they are fighting for the ‘religion of peace’ or spreading the ‘gospel of love’.

Now let us turn our gaze to North Korea. Here we have a whole people living under the harshest of conditions, who are forced to worship a hateful, self-centered egomaniac who craves the adulation of the people he tortures and enslaves. He has his country believe that he is their savior, that all the countries around them are the enemy, and that everyone but himself is evil.

In light of this example we have undeniable proof that you can make people believe anything if you are brutal and ruthless enough. This allows for a far more likely explanation for the evil we see in religion every day, one that makes sense:

If Satan exist today, it is far more likely that the religious people in truth are worshipping him; Satan, who like North Korea’s Kim, has you believe he is the benevolent supreme being.

But if this were true, why wouldn’t the benevolent God intervene? Because, like in Korea, Satan is the only supreme being. There is no benevolent god.

Just Satan. They are the same – he is God.

Now, it all makes sense. Scripture and organized religion are a tool to force people to worship him. Intense worship of this God, due to his nature, allows evil to spread. Evil in this world goes unchecked not because it is ‘natural’, but because it is part of the decidedly un-benevolent God, who occasionally hides his true face because he wants to be adored, and who sends his brutal savages to force you into his religion.

So, if you truly want to reconcile all the evil in this world with an existing God, it leaves this depressing conclusion as the most likely one.

And that’s probably one of the biggest complaints I have with faith: I think it says a lot about religion when a crazy conspiracy theory is more sane than what people actually believe.

Atheist = Liars!

Christian religious (fundamental?) site TodayChristian.net deigned to publish a (sadly unattributed) article exposing us atheists as shameless liars. Yes, every frigging Atheist is a liar. Since the kind people running TodayChristian.net are Christians, they can’t lie about that, so such sweeping accusation must be true.

What heinous lies are we telling the world? Take us to task, TodayChristian.net:

1. The Biggest One- THERE IS NO GOD. They would have no problem telling a dying child there is NO God. Clearly they have no idea if there is or there isn’t.

And right off the bat, they crater. Unless you can prove that gods exist (something we all agree is impossible at best), this isn’t a lie, just an opinion. Still, I know few atheists who say ‘There is no God’. Most say ‘I don’t believe that there are gods’.
Adding the ‘dying child’ bit is a quite pathetic attempt at tear-jerking. Would I tell a dying child a comforting lie? Probably. At least I know that I’m lying…

Then again – if I ever catch a believer telling a dying atheist child that she is going to hell, there will be physical consequences, my peace-loving nature be damned.

2. They say they have “Open Minds”. We know that is not the case. When presented with spiritual issues they always dismiss it as fictitious, invalid or unsupported stories.

That’s rich coming from someone who’s mind is so closed that not only they assert the existence of gods, but have laser-focused on one in particular, and are not swayed at all by a mountain of evidence to the contrary.

When a believer says ‘you are so closed minded’, I feel they are really saying ‘you should think like me’.

3. Christianity teaches you to not think.

Ouch. Well, I’m sure some Atheists say that. Perhaps while quoting Martin Luther (‘Reason is the devil’s greatest whore’). But the fact is, most Atheist lament the fact that Christians don’t think, or don’t think enough. Anyone up for the definition of Faith? We don’t give a damn about what Christianity teaches. We merely observe the result.

4. Science exists despite religion.

This one would actually be funny – if we were to ignore the scores of people who died or endured hardship because their scientific discoveries contradicted religion (Galileo ring a bell?). So modern science does exist despite religious worst attempts to suppress it. Yet, religion was our first attempt at science. Today, Religion exists in spite of science. Few Atheists would argue otherwise. That’s why we think believers don’t think enough.

5. They Don’t Care If There Is Or Isn’t A God. Deep down inside of everyone’s heart there is a missing element that is always questioning, searching and longing to find God. They may try to ignore it but it still remains there.

Wow. Can you be more condescending? That longing you feel inside? That is actually your intellect, begging you to be let out.

Just once.